I was taking a long bus ride about 15 years ago from Cairo to Jerusalem to spend Christmas Eve in Bethlehem with my “new boyfriend,” who is now the father of my two children and both my business and life partner.
That Christmas Eve celebration was amazing – beautiful in so many ways, but especially for the people who were brought together that evening. Israeli Jews and Palestinians were celebrating side by side. German children performed, as did a chorus from Africa. We celebrated alongside Australians, Brits, Arabs and Jews, and it even snowed in the early morning hours, something extremely rare for that part of the world.
Looking back now, I realize how rare all of that was and how that is the power of Christmas in its ability often to bring together people who would not normally come together, perhaps to get families to cross bridges and step over differences to celebrate the holiday season together, to plant the seeds of forgiveness and to focus our attention on love.
I should focus on that in this piece, but instead I’m going to indulge myself a bit and go back to my memory of Christmas at Bethlehem and the weeks that preceded it in Egypt.
The weekend after Thanksgiving that year, I got stuck in an elevator in Alexandria, Egypt. It was an old elevator in a not-very-nice building that was a hybrid of a hostel and motel.
It’s an experience that could have been awful, but instead it was exhilarating and, to be honest, perfect, because I was stuck in that elevator with someone I desperately wanted to be stuck with; someone I longed to be near; someone I had been harboring intense feelings for under the auspice of friendship, when really my feelings were much stronger than that. Thus, the only terrifying aspect of the experience was confronting my feelings and wondering when or if I would confess them.
Eventually I did, but not at that moment in that elevator. Instead, we both climbed out of the elevator; he went first, then I followed and jumped into his arms. Well, I’m not really sure if that is what happened in actuality, but in my romantic, filmmaker memory, it is.
Our evening continued and included a rooftop dinner at a pretty good Chinese restaurant and a card game that ended with a first kiss, as well as a sleepless night and a shared sunrise amid the confession of feelings held inside. The excitement of young love swirled around us. My stomach was full of butterflies, and I had the feeling that my life would never be the same. I was right.
I’m sure being a filmmaker affects the way I view life, including the way I look at the past, but I remember having certain feelings even then. I remember that when I first saw this young man, I thought to myself: This guy is trouble. (Good trouble, though.) I was sunk. I knew it. It was just a question of whether he would ever know it.
He stirred things up. He shifted my worldview. He quite literally changed my life. But I changed his life, too. There have been twists and turns, bumps and mountains and lots of challenges, but now, 15 years later, I can safely and quite assertively say we made each other’s lives better. We’ve brought out the best in each other. We’ve pushed each other in important ways, and I’d like to think we still do that for each other.
The first time I saw him, I knew he mattered. I knew he would be a part of my life, but I never could imagine what having him in my life would mean. Now to have two amazing and beautiful sons with him and to run our own company together and to challenge ourselves daily to create art that moves us forward and while is complex, frightening and wonderful is something I never could have imagined.
Someday, I want to go back to Alexandria and Cairo with him – and with our sons. I want to revisit some of those streets we walked together. Perhaps we’ll even find that elevator (although I’d rather not get stuck in it this time). I want to revisit the place where it all started. I am grateful for the magic that was my 6 months in Egypt. Being completely pulled out of one’s comfort zone makes many things possible. It allows new relationships to develop. It encourages open-mindedness. It is challenging, but in all of the best ways. I’ve realized now how important it is to shake things up and stand outside of my comfort zone.
I’ve discovered that one of the most important relationships in my life grew out of an experience in which I was completely out of my comfort zone, out of my depth. I’ve discovered that, as an artist, doing work that makes me uncomfortable, work that pushes me out of my comfort zone, is so important. It is where the good stuff lives. I’ve discovered the importance of getting stuck in an old elevator and the magic of climbing out – and I’ve discovered that it’s so much better to shake up your life alongside someone you love.
How will you step out of your comfort zone in the New Year? How will you shake up your life? And who will you do it with?
Jennifer Fischer is co-founder of the SCV Film Festival, a mom of two, an independent filmmaker and owner of Think Ten Media Group, whose Generation Arts division offers programs for SCV youth. She writes about her parenting journey on her blog, The Good Long Road. Her commentary is published Saturdays on SCVNews.com.
COMMENT POLICY: We welcome comments from individuals and businesses. All comments are moderated. Comments are subject to rejection if they are vulgar, combative, or in poor taste.
REAL NAMES ONLY: All posters must use their real individual or business name. This applies equally to Twitter account holders who use a nickname.
All opinions and ideas are welcome. Factually inaccurate, libelous, defamatory, profane or hateful statements are not.
Your words must be your own. All commentary is subject to editing for legibility. There is no length limit, but the shorter,
the better the odds of people reading it. "Local" SCV-related topics are preferred. Send commentary to: LETTERS (at) SCVNEWS.COM. Author's full name, community name, phone number and e-mail address are required. Phone numbers and e-mail addresses are not published except at author's request. Acknowledgment of submission does not guarantee publication.
Helping our students stay on track to complete their goals remains our top priority. To that end, we are offering a wide variety of classes this spring designed to do just that.
The Santa Clarita Veteran Services Collaborative has continued to actively serve our veteran community throughout the COVID–19 pandemic which began one year ago.
In partnership with the Santa Clarita Valley Sheriff’s Station, the city of Santa Clarita will launch its “Guard That Auto” campaign this spring to combat an increase in grand theft auto over the past year.
The city of Santa Clarita, in partnership with the Santa Clarita Sister Cities program, invites local students to submit artwork, poetry, essays/creative writing, photographs, or music for the 2021 Sister Cities International Young Artists and Authors Showcase.
In a rush to bring children back to California schools after a year of closed campuses, Governor Gavin Newsom and lawmakers said Monday the state will offer $2 billion to school districts willing to reopen next month.
The race to get a COVID-19 vaccine in Los Angeles County despite vaccine shortages is cutthroat and most people don’t even know they’re in the competition.
The Sand Canyon Resort project is scheduled to return before the Santa Clarita Planning Commission Tuesday with a series of revisions, following multiple concerns raised by both commissioners and residents.
Los Angeles County Public Health officials on Friday confirmed 144 new deaths and 1,838 new cases of COVID-19 countywide, with 26,045 total cases in the Santa Clarita Valley.
The Girl Scouts of Greater Los Angeles announced on Feb. 26 that Kenya Yarbrough will lead its newly-created and first-ever Diversity, Equity, Inclusivity, Access, and Advocacy Initiative.
The Valley Industry Association will welcome College of the Canyons Chancellor Dr. Dianne G. Van Hook as the keynote speaker for the March VIA Virtual Series taking place Tuesday, March 16, from 11:00 a.m to 12:15 p.m.
The Child and Family Center's Domestic Violence Program is set to host its fourth annual "Night of Expression" art exhibit on Saturday, Feb. 27, in recognition of Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month.
California Department of Public Health officials announced on Feb. 26 that California is on track to create the capacity to administer 3 million vaccinations per week by March 1.
The California Department of Motor Vehicles announced a new round of extensions for commercial driver’s licenses expiring through May 31 that will help commercial drivers focus on delivering essential products and supplies during the COVID-19 emergency.
The Los Angeles County Department of Consumer and Business Affairs (DCBA) announced Thursday the upcoming launch of the Los Angeles Online Dispute Resolution (LA-ODR) program, in collaboration with the Superior Court of California, Los Angeles County and its Dispute Resolution Program (DRP), and the Center for Conflict Resolution.
A former manager of the Valencia COVID-19 testing lab is being sued by the operator for breaching her contract after she accused the company of poor performance.
REAL NAMES ONLY: All posters must use their real individual or business name. This applies equally to Twitter account holders who use a nickname.
0 Comments
You can be the first one to leave a comment.